Super DC Heroes: The Dark Knight – Cat Commander Book Review

Super DC Heroes: The Dark Knight – Cat Commander Book ReviewThe Dark Knight must save Gotham City from a mob of house cats. Yay, they must be really running out of ideas for Batman stories. I hope Cat Commander it’s the purrrfect kid’s story full of action, intrigue and a wonderful plot. It has to be right, cause why else would this book cost $18.99?

I am in the process of reading more of these Dark Knight series of books and so far this is the weakest one I’ve read. The plot is crazy in all sense of the word. It’s not even laughable, it’s just sad. How the author J.E. Bright even got paid for this is beyond me. There is even a spelling mistake in the 2nd paragraph! Maybe they should have sent these Bat Books through the ‘ol Bat-Computer before printing them.

Super DC Heroes: The Dark Knight – Cat Commander Book Review

Like I said, the plot is stupid. Catwoman steals a magical ancient Egyptian specter that somehow can control cats but not every other kind of animal, Humans included. The book also refers to the Egyptians as Ancient Egyptians with the ancient being capitalized. They did not refer to themselves as ancient so this is a weird writing choice. Well anyways, mammals are mostly on the land and share a surprisingly huge amount of similarity with each other mammal so why are they not controlled in the same way by the scepter?

Well Catwoman uses this weird device to call upon Gotham’s cats to her hide out. She plans on holding the cats ransom so the rats of the city will take over Gotham. Something about cat’s being slaves is thrown in as well. This mind-numbing plot is tragic because of the many cool and interesting ways you could use Catwoman in a Batman story. Instead readers get this. Even the title is tragic going off of what Catwoman wanted having cat’s be treated like Humans. That hardle invokes the word commander. Some better title choices might be The Cat’s Out To Play, Feline Freedom, In A Purrfect World for example.

Super DC Heroes: The Dark Knight – Cat Commander Book Review

At the end of the book Catwoman is stuck in a convention center, trapped it seems from escape. I have had that experience before, especially if it’s a job fair. There is nothing fair about looking for a work at a job fair that is full of employers that say nothing more than “Well Mr. Deadly unemployed person, you can apply online”. Or the scummy organizers boosting the number of employers by including the Air Force, Navy, Marines, Coast Guard and Army. Really these are not jobs, nor is places like big box stores who just use the event to advertise.  Batman himself would be shocked to find even one company out of a 100 that could fit his billing for employment. That should be the next Batman adventure, Career Fair Hijinks!

Sorry for the random off-shoot but job fairs are the devil! Well onto the story front once again. Batman is worried about hurting the cats to get to Catwoman. And The Commissioner is worried people will sue if the cat’s get hurt. There is no talk about cats being slaves which Catwoman was complaining about that might have sparked a more interesting plot. If the scope of having all the cats in one place is such a big deal then why did Batman not just nuke the convention center

Super DC Heroes: The Dark Knight – Cat Commander Book Review

Instead Catwoman escapes yet again to do more evil plots and put the people of Gotham City in danger. It would be sad that a few thousand cats die but to stop a super-villain, that is acceptable loses as far as I’m concerned. No doubt the mayor of Gotham won’t be reelected because he agreed not to listen to Catwoman’s demands and we all know how anger pet owners can get.

I wonder if they considered doing a spin-off of this book on what happened when the dogs took over since the cats were gone. Cat Commander is shallow and if you are thinking about purchasing it you should be spayed and neutered by Bob Barker.

Bonus Review:

Super DC Heroes: The Dark Knight – Cat Commander Book Review

At the back of the book it shows a neat little biography of Catwoman. I like this idea and it does provide some history on the character. But I see some problems. It lists her occupation as professional thief. That is not a profession; you don’t get a pay check or fill out a W-2. I thought she was some office chick or something? Least that’s a profession.

Sometimes in the book it annoys me that the illustrations show action in the story that happens after you look at the picture on the next pages. It’s like they had no direction on where to put the images at all. I think for the most part they should have chosen wide, scene setting pictures so the reader could get a grasp of the location better. Then fill in the bits with their imagination, instead there are very tight focused pictures that don’t have much importance other than breaking up the pages of words. I wish we got to see some scenes where thousands of cats were in the convention center or walking down the street. The one shot they do use shows cat’s looking like they popped out from the devil himself. Its Bat-Tragic.

If you have not figured it out from reading this is a work of fiction for fun only. So if you don’t have a sense of humor, get one. Names, characters, places and incidents either are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events or locales or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental so bite me!

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