Sam belted a blast deep to left field as he touted off to first base for what looks like a homerun he thought to himself after letting out a huge fart “Boy, I wish I had not eaten up all them chimichangas before the game. I told my Clare (his wife) that I gotta start eating better, but she is trying to fatten me up like I am going to leave her or something”. The ball kept sailing but a strong wind brought it back into the park. It hit off the outfield wall as the fielder dove for it, it looks like he was going to make it second easily. The ball came flying in as Sam dove as he gathered himself up from the dirty ground he was worried there might just be another stain on part of his uniform and he yelled out “Damn you Clare”.
Sam is part of the elite group of players that have stuck out at least six times in a game! He accomplished this milestone July 17th 1991 while on the Orioles playing against the Royals.
Card: Sam Horn – Orioles
Company: Upper Deck
Design / Picture: D – While I am glad there is two different photos for this card, on the front, he really is sticking out his ass too much. Maybe they should have super-imposed the bat to cover up that huge thing he is dragging along.
On the back there is a nice photo of him posing, but since he is so strong why does it look like he is cold? And for me, the helmet not being faced towards the camera is really un-professional. But I wonder are both of the shots on this card meant for a non-authorized baseball card? On the back especially it looks like Sam is blocking the logo of his shirt – maybe he is just embarrassed to be on the Orioles, I know I would be.
If you have not figured it out from reading this is a work of fiction for fun. So if you don’t have a sense of humor, get one.